Chapter 13: What you’re really trying to control


It’s worth chipping in here to chat about anorexia recovery

Is your weight controllable?

Introduction to weight set point theory

Why lack of control is the best thing ever

 What we’re really trying to control 

Feeling “fat”

Actual weight as your trigger 

Shifting your perception 


Fat bias 

Role models 

Enter the body-positive world – LOOK AT BODY POSITIVE IMAGES EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
(If you’re not already).

This is really, really important. Do it. Somehow, some way. Figure out what way of finding
images works for you. Instagram/Pinterest are great tools, but if you’re easily triggered by social media, you may want to create a separate account just for this purpose so that you don’t have to weed through triggering material to do this work.

If this sounds impossible, you can also read something body positive on some of those days—which is also very helpful. Basically, starting now, I want you to surround yourself with as much body-positive culture (e.g. media, people, and ideas) as possible. Looking at images of bodies your size or larger on a consistent and regular basis is the most effective way to start rewiring your own beauty standards.

Remember, you learned your current food and weight beliefs through culture—and you can unlearn them through culture as well. To get started, check out my Instagram, look at who I follow and follow any body-positive accounts that I am following (ignore any accounts that may trigger you in any way such as the occasional fitness accounts I follow). When you find someone you really like click the little arrow under their profile and it will show you suggestions of similar accounts.

There is an ever-growing world of body-positive images out there (especially on Instagram), and the more time you spend looking at “alternative” body shapes and sizes, the more your brain will slowly start to shift towards inclusivity of the images you consume.

This article first and foremost, explains and references the research demonstrating that “looking at body diversity” actually improves body image. It’s a little “science-y,” but it basically says that spending time looking at people your size or bigger over and over again consistently is the most effective way (that we know of) to change your body image over time.

Lindy West says: “My entire body-acceptance process can be reduced to 16 words—look at
pictures of fat women on the internet until they don’t make you uncomfortable anymore.”


Read this Diet Letter

Journaling prompts

Suggested reading/listening/watching

How to find your set point weight

Will I keep gaining weight forever if I live in food freedom?

Read THIS Article from Virgie Tovar: 3 levels of fatphobia

9 tips to better body confidence

How Do I Love Myself When I don’t Know Where To Start?

Body Goals’ and binge eating recovery

The science behind how hunger and fat gain works 👇🏽